We have keys and garage door opener. Paperwork is signed, and a gigantic check has been handed over. This evening, after dinner, we marked our territory by bringing over some boxes and pissing in the corner. Well, okay, we only did one of those. Point is: ours. Yoink. Snagged.

The previous owner did forget to clear the win out of the house, but we're okay with an excess of win. He was also cool enough to leave the patio furniture and some fireplace stuff.

Maybe we moved the win in with us, because everything went smoothly. Closing took twenty minutes, give or take. The bank's agent was a pro, and he banged his way through the paperwork one-two-three. Since neither we nor the seller really felt much need to quibble, that was it.

Our realtor was stunned. Granting that we basically handed this deal to her on a platter, she was just waiting for something to go wrong. But, no. Yoink, house scored, and a package of win delivered for Solstice.

Honestly, the time between November 1st and December 31st is the most depressing time of the year for me.


I feel bad for the Christians, because Christmas is no longer a holiday celebrating the birth of their Messiah, but a contest to see who can get the most, or put on the best party, or be the best parent or grandparent by giving the most sought after and/or expensive present.

It's a time when high school students bust their ass to get volunteer hours done. Not because they want to help out, but because they need the hours to look good on their transcripts for college applications.

It's a time of year when people fight over purchases that won't matter in one month's time.

It's a time of year where children emotionally blackmail parents into getting what they want.

It's a time of year when people lament having to visit family they rarely see. Yet, when that family member passes on, their tune changes and memories of holiday's past turn a more positive and loving light.


It's a time of year when human's true nature comes out. And it isn't pretty.

I understand why suicide rates go up during this period.

Holidays present just for ya'll, Life of Vice #1 is done. Read it here ( http://robin.utsib.net/comics.htm ). Hope you like it!

I'm doing eight drawings in honour of Hanukkah. Granted, it probably would have meant more if I started posting on the first night of Hanukkah, but details, details. Click on the picture above to be taken to the site and read more of my ramblings.

1.) The Hanukkah Aardvark* was very good to me on the first night of Hanukkah. He brought me a netbook. Granted, the Hanukkah Aardvark had me stand in line outside of Best Buy on Black Friday to get one at an insanely low price, as is the spirit of the Hanukkah Aardvark. It don't matter. I love it and have named it Severus.


2.) Three words. Major. League. Dreidel.

http://www.majorleaguedreidel.com/







3.) Tomorrow, as our third night present, I'm taking Jonathan to see Avenue Q. I am so excited. I haven't seen it since it was in previews.






*The Hanukkah Aardvark was not my idea, but stolen from an episode of the television show, Friends. Ross, wanting his son to get excited over his Jewish roots, creates the Hanukkah Aardvark as a rival to Christmas' Santa.

...unfriendly guinea pigs, happy dead people, and optometrist-approved quails. If you aren't already braced, grab someone close to you. (And tell them I think they are lovely.)

I have been writing up a storm of silly design posts over on the :01 blog lately. Posts about Victorian Babies Who Like to Shave and used the blog as an excuse to take all of the jackets off my books and photograph the most awesome things I found hiding underneath them. The latest was super fun to do and I did it all For the Love of "g". It's a tribute to my favorite letter! (People have those right?) I friggin love lower case g's especially in "American Typewriter" which I think it looks like a fat little quail. Whenever I tell people that they always say "Well, actually, Coll-leeen. I would have to say it looks more like a pair spectacles." To which I say "I don't know WHAT ya'll are talkin' bout" after which point I put a live quail over my face so I can see better.

I made a silly little poster of 50 of my favorite g's. Also that blog post contains a link to one of the weirder more charming Sesame Street moments I've found online yet! It doesn't seem that weird until the ending just goes on forever. GEEEEEEEEE! Love it!



Okay now for the REAL excitment...at least on my part! My book ALMOST exists!!!! I've gotten to see dummies of the finished book which I am now allowed to talk about because it's REAL! (And has just started to go out to reviewers and such...eep!) It comes out in APRIL officially both in hardcover and super inexpensive paperback! It's even up for presale at Amazon and B&N already...though I would encourage you to ask your local bookstore to get it when it comes out because I love little bookstores.

It's a super silly mystery series for the 3rd grade type aka MY PEOPLE...or at least the people who I always have the best conversations. It stars a fiesty Guinea Pig who is forced to solve crimes in a Pet Shop when the "g" in pig falls off her sign and a narcoleptic hamster (that thinks he is a Koala) becomes convinced she is a private investigator. Those of you who used to read FLUFF will recognize Hamisher the Hamster since he is a slightly more sane version (but not MUCH) of everyone's favorite insane jerboa, Furboa! My editor, the lovely Carol, was a fan of the Fluff comic, not to mention being one of my favorite people in the world.

The cover!


When I first saw the art I literally had to run around in circles for about ten minutes to calm down my excitement. The genius-y Stephanie Yue drew the cutest versions of the things in my brain I could have ever imagined. She took panels that were 1/2 funny and made them downright pants-peeing! I am so damn proud to be working with her on this series! And the design dork in me love, love, LOVED the color palette!

The animals all live in a pet store where the owner is a very sweet man who, unfortunately for the animals in the shop, can't tell the difference between any of them and is always putting them back in the wrong cages. That lead to perhaps my favorite out of context line from the story "As you can tell from the bottom of the cage, camels poop woodchips..." POOP! WOO! My third grade self would be so proud!



I can't show TOO much, but here's perhaps my favorite page in the book, which gives you an idea about Hamisher's craziness and Sasspants' determination to be left alone. Fourth panel is a perfect example of Steph being the aweseomest. I musta laughed at that panel for an hour. Also check out that gorgeous lettering! That's all from the hand of Zack Giallongo. Between Carol, Steph, and Zack I feel like I've been placed on a dream team. When we are done with these books, we'll likely go on to save the world. It's pretty inevitable.



I have been quiet for many reasons in this land of blog, but one of them was pretty fantastic: I just got back from a last minute trip to Paris! I had enough flight miles saved up for another trip to Japan...but when that fell through I instead got to go and visit my friend Curt for the lovely price of $30 in taxes! My (luckily great at speaking-french) friend Meghan joined me and the two of us paraded around that city having a great time. I am pretty sure 90% of my body weight is nutella and cheese at this point. Mmmmm.

More on the trip soon, when I get around to posting some cool pictures, but one of the big things I fell in love with in France was something I never do at home...namely watching TV! They had the greatest music channels and every morn Meghan and I would watch videos while we got ready. I will now share with you the two men and the chicken who I am going to marry.

Charlie Winston's KICK THE BUCKET may not be French, but lordie do those Frenchies love him there! He was in their top 10 every day and this song could not be any catchier. His dance moves at the end! I know that wasn't quite a sentence just now, but HIS DANCE MOVES AT THE END! Warning: This will be stuck in your head if you listen and you will walk around singing cheerily about death. No doubt about that.



The second was an actual french fella named Julien Doré. This song "Les Limites" is not only delicious to the ears, but the video is BRILLIANT! That's Julien dancing in the background. Make sure you get to the end since I love those last 5 seconds!



The REAL charm about Julien is that this isn't the only version they filmed and released! There's a version where they switch places. A version where the dove man gets to star. A version in a very small pub hallway. And these are all official videos by the REAL people. You add all of those to the 100's of videos of people reenacting it in all sorts of super silly ways and if you are anything like me you will lose a few wonderous hours of your life to youtube glory. People having fun being super silly dancing with butter knives, fake chickens, and bad wigs. Heaven! You've arrived at last!

1.) Monday's Shortpacked strip tells of the joy of working retail in December and the error of wishing someone a Happy Holiday instead of a Merry Christmas.

http://www.shortpacked.com/d/20091207.html

Originally only going to send this to myselftheliar but decided there might be a few other LJ friends who can relate to this scenario as well.

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2.)



Haters to the left, James Andrew is one fierce bitch. I hope that I am one tenth a GQMF as James Andrew is when I grow up.

Who is James Andrew? He is the ultimate dandy. Gatsby meets Gucci style. A GQMF. Below is a link to his blog where you can seen what he is doing, where he is doing it and what he is wearing while he does it.

http://www.whatisjameswearing.com/

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3.)Currently reading an alternate history, steampunk, zombie novel. It's called Boneshaker by Cherie Priest.

Currently listening to a lot of Tom Waits.

Currently obsessing over; amigurumi, almond milk, vegan pumpkin cranberry muffins, and Frank & Hilde.